Conflict

Conflict in close relationships is not only inevitable, it's essential. Intimacy connects people who are inevitably different -- as the saying goes, if two people agree about everything, one of them is superfluous. Conflict is the mechanism by which we set boundaries around these differences, so that each party feels safe with the other.
(Martha Beck, life coach, in Words That Matter by the Editors of The Oprah Magazine, p. 53)
18 November 2015

Boundaries

... boundaries are a civilizing ingredient in social interaction, a matter of self-respect and respect for others. Setting limits requires some degree of communication skills because others cannot read my mind nor I theirs. Others need to know how I feel and I need to lovingly communicate my feelings. Likewise, it is important that I listen to and respect their feelings.
(Hope For Today, 6 November)

******

Melva hung the ornaments on our little Christmas tree. I unwrapped the rest of the figurines from the Christmas Village display and replaced three light bulbs that I didn't like in the ceramic houses yesterday. I'll need to go up in the attic one more time to organize the empty boxes and to put away the last boxes when the decorating is done. We've been working on the project for at least three days.

Dick Henthorn

4 December 2014

Boundaries

Setting boundaries can be an important step in simplifying your life, and it does not require an explanation.
(The Twelve Steps For Christians, p. 7)
15 April 2014

Treasures

When you cut down the number of treasures you try to hang on to, you may find that each treasure you keep grows brighter and more beautiful every day.
(Cindy Glovinsky, Making Peace With The Things In Your Life, p. 80)

Physical, financial, and emotional challenges are real. They create boundaries in our lives. However, no one said we cannot move beyond boundaries. Your life is a reflection of what you believe.
(Iyanla Vanzant, Faith In The Valley, p. 99)
18 March 2014

The Problem With Life

Photo: Neptune Plaza at the Library of Congress

It may seem painful to think and reflect, but bringing your own intelligence to bear on everyday experience can add an essential dimension that gives its own kind of pleasure. (Thomas Moore, Dark Nights Of The Soul, p. 31)

Spare time happens now, through conscious choices and decisions. ... Remember: we don't find spare time; we create it. (Doreen Virture, Ph.D., I'd Change My Life If I Had More Time, p. 3)

What is important in knowledge is not quantity, but quality. It is important to know what knowledge is significant, what is less so, and what is trivial. (Leo Tolstoy, A Calendar Of Wisdom, 14 November)

For though we are made especially for the sake of one another, still each of us has his own tasks. Otherwise another's faults would harm me, which God has not willed, in order that my happiness may not depend on another. (Marcus Aurelius, Meditations (paraphrased))

That is the problem with life. If we are not here, if we are not in the present moment, fully ourselves, we miss everything. (Tich Nhat Hanh in Shield & Carlson, For The Love Of God, p. 154)

We must all band together and treat people as dignified, and any efforts to divide people by class, nations, religions or any boundaries is strongly resisted by those who think in holistic ways. (Dr. Wayne W. Dyer, The Skies The Limit, p. 113)

You can tell a lot about which direction your life is heading by looking at the people with whom you've chosen to spend your time and share your ideas. (John C. Maxwell, Leadership, April introduction)
17 May 2013

Boundaries

Boundaries prevent us from obligating ourselves to do things we shouldn't be doing in the first place and from being taken advantage of by others. (Harry and Emily Griffith, This Love We Share, 14 April) 12 May 2013

Denial

Typically, people in denial are not good processors. They do not explore problems and issues; they have little curiosity about them. They state their denial and change the subject. (Cloud & Townsend, Boundaries Face To Face, p. 149) 20 April 2013

Until You Know Better

Until you know better, assume a person is innocent of bad motives or intents, and approach him accordingly. (Cloud & Townsend, Boundaries Face To Face, p. 100)

If you want to establish and maintain peaceful relationships with other people, surrender all judgments of who they are and who they are not. If you want your relationships with other people to be healthy and fulfilling, surrender your expectations and set clear boundaries. (Iyanla Vanzant, Until Today!, 15 December)

Speculating on other people's attitudes and motives is a waste of time and effort. To search out the reasons for your own is a voyage of discovery. (One Day At A Time In Al-Anon, 3 December)

11 March 2013

Change

Things can change when the person experiencing the effects of the problem takes the initiative to resolve it. (Cloud & Townsend, Boundaries Face To Face, p. 16)

******

Serif had a good software sale, on older versions of their programs, at the end of the year.  One of the computer club members sent a heads-up Email.  I couldn't make up my mind whether I wanted to spend the money or not.  I waited until the last minute before deciding to order three programs for $15.00 each.

I purchased and downloaded:

• PagePlus X5 - installed on 12 January 2013
• WebPlus X5
• PhotoPlus X4

I'll be very busy in 2013 if I intend to master these three programs.  Stay tuned.

Mr. Dickie

13 January 2013

Your Sense Of Identity

The Bridge of No Return - Panmunjom, Korea

To confine the entire sum of your personality and gifts within the boundaries of your current job is to put yourself in the precarious position of losing your sense of identity when your job changes. (Laurie Beth Jones, The Path, p. 9) 8 January 2013

Boundaries

... establish and maintain clear boundaries and ... honor the boundaries others have set for themselves. (Iyanla Vanzant, Until Today! 13 September) 28 November 2012

Possessions

[The goal of advertising is to create] ... another catchy way to have us spend money we don't have to buy things we don't need to impress people we don't like. (The Upper Room Disciplines - 2008, 30 June)

As humans, we have a natural propensity toward addiction ... Too many of us spend too much of our time accumulating stuff and things that fill our time but do not fulfill our lives, we seek more and more and obtain less and less. (The Upper Room Disciplines - 2008, 24 June)

We're always in danger of ending up possessed by our possessions. (Johann Christoph Arnold, Escape Routes, p. 44)

... whatever you're dragging around could kill you. (Johann Christoph Arnold, Escape Routes, p. 80)

Sometimes the best thing I can do with things that seem well worth keeping is to give them away. (Karen Barber, Daily Guideposts - 2010, 13 January)

The greatest disappointment (and resulting pain) you can feel is when you have just experienced that which you thought would bring you the ultimate in pleasure - and it has let you down.  Pleasure without boundaries produces life without purpose. (Ravi Zacharias, The End Of Reason, p. 41)

Since every choice I make rules out the alternatives and since I won't live long enough to do everything, my choices say something about what I value most. (Harold S. Kushner, The Lord Is My Shepherd, p. 89)

... I will never feel deprived or diminished if I don't get what I yearn for, because I know how blessed I am by what I have. (Harold S. Kushner, The Lord Is My Shepherd, p. 36)
29 February 2012